My little Smiley Cade and Serious All-Business Cal

Boy, it's amazing how different my sons are. I mean they are like night and day different. Polar opposites in looks and personalities. I love this about them. They have such unique little personalities. Raising them has, at times, been quite confusing. Cade does things as a baby that Cal never did. I thought I was totally prepared for my second baby after Cal but Cade does the opposite of what Cal did.

 Where Cal screamed, Cade's quiet. Cal was always serious and stoic like "Bring my dang bottle and make sure it's the perfect temp, and make it snappy!". Cade is just smiley and happy to see me and just "Bring my bottle when you have a chance and don't worry about getting it the right temp". Cal would throw a complete fit if I got the temp of the bottle wrong. Which consisted of him throwing his arms up, kicking his legs, slap the bottle out of my hand and scream bloody murder if the temp was "slightly off". He started doing this at 4 months old. This would last 5-10 minutes and then he would give me an eat sh%# look and try the bottle I warmed up a little more. I better have gotten it right or we would have to go through this ordeal again. True story. Real talk here. Just ask Ashley Terry. Calvin is the king of giving the most dirty I-Hate-You looks. He's done it since he was....well, since he was born. He also would throw fits like this when I nursed him and tried to change breast.

I got it wrong a lot of times but I tried my best to get it right.

Cade on the other hand didn't mind if I took his bottle from him 100 times. He would wait patiently for me to give it back. As long as his bottle was slightly warm, he was happy. Cade is more interested in socializing when I get up with him during the night. Cal was give me my bottle and then put me down and don't bother me again until I give you notice. Cade wants to look around his nursery, talk to me, eat, and laugh. He just never stops smiling. He is our social butterfly. He gets so excited when people are around and will let anyone hold him. Cal is very cautious. Cade just wants someone to look at him and he could smile all day.

I love their little personalities. They keep Trent and I laughing at all times. They are my greatest blessings and accomplishments.

33 Years

It's that time of year again. The time that I have started to kinda dread. I turned 33 today, and frankly I just don't want to get any older. Next birthday, I will be considered to be in my "mid-30s". Booooo! I feel just 22! Time just never stops. It marches on and on. The only thing that stays the same is that everything changes. This seems kind of depressing to me. Sometimes I just want to turn back the clocks and go back to being 10. Or 11. Or 12. I just want to go back and enjoy being a child one more time. I even start to bargain with god and promise to be the best 10 year old ever! I want to enjoy spending time with my family and friends a little more. Why did I want to grow up so fast? I always wished I was older when I was younger, and now that I'm older I just wish I could go back to being younger. Adults used to say "Why do you want to grow up so fast?" "Just enjoy being young". Unfortunately, I was an adult before I realized what they were talking about. Then it was too late. I was sucked into adulthood and responsibilities sought me out and laid claim on my life. They control me and dictate everything I do in my life now. I can not escape them, for they will seek me out and find me. This is why they always say "Enjoy being young". One day your life will be ruled by responsibilities!!

I have a message for young children who want to grow up so fast. PLEASE ENJOY EVERY SECOND OF EVERYDAY JUST BEING A CHILD AND FREE OF RESPONSIBILITIES. Being a grown-up is much harder than being a child. Young adults need to slow down and enjoy the journey. Say I love you more often. Be a better friend. Be a better daughter/son and treasure family time. Be active. Date anyone and everyone, just don't get serious. Not till you're like 23. Or 24. Dance, even if everyone laughs at you. Stand up for what is right but know it may not "be cool". Love life and be passionate about helping others. Smile when things seem terrible, they're really not that bad. Be good to yourself and show yourself the utmost respect. You deserve it.

I can't complain about my life. It has been a wonderful adventure so far. Like a roller coaster, there have been many ups and downs. There have been loops and bends a long the way but I always tried to learn a lesson from these. I ended up with a job absolutely love. It helps keep me humble. I have a terrific husband. He makes having kids seem easier and fun. I have the sweetest kids. They always make me laugh. And sometimes make me really mad. But I love them more than words will ever be able to describe. I have awesome parents. I just LOVE when they come to visit. Overall I would say I'm living the dream.

So I don't really fret too much about turning 33. We're all going to get old and die. there's just no way around it, and frankly, I really don't mind. I think I'll enjoy heaven quite much! What I'll do in the meantime is just enjoy being 33. I'll enjoy everything the way it is at this very moment. I won't wish my kids were older and potty-trained. Or that I had more money to spend. Or that i was already retired and able to travel more, etc. I'm just going to love it and enjoy these precious moments. Who knows, One day I'll be 63 and wonder why I wanted to grow up and not enjoy being 33.

It's so easy to get overwhelmed in life and not enjoy the precious moments. We need to try to take time and breath the fresh air. MAKE time to enjoy life.

Life with my yin and yang

Life has become quite busy with 2 boys under the age of two. These guys keep me on my toes at all times. If I happen to get distracted by the T.V. and watch a show for 2 minutes, then I will pay for it. For example: About 8 ft of wall will be drawn on. I mean all over! All done in the 2 minutes I get distracted in the T.V. Or after changing the little one's diaper I notice my older son is smiling holding my toothbrush. That's real nice he decided to clean the floor but why use mommy's toothbrush!?!? Oh, maybe we could pour all the goldfish down the vent or just go hide mama's debit card. The best one yet? Put mommy's phone in the garbage can and wait for her to figure out it's missing 4 hours later. Then help her frantically search for it like he's got no clue where it is. All done within a 2 minute distraction period. Yes, many joys in having 2 little boys under the age of 2 years!

With this being said, I do not regret having them so close together (they are 17 months apart). I planned it this way. There are days were I just feel like I've gone insane, and days where being with these two are the happiest days in my life. Occasionally there are those days I just loose it and feel like the worst mom in history. But the majority of the time I just love watching these 2 little boys interact and play. Calvin and Caden are quite entertaining and put on a show everyday. And everyday they do something new that makes me smile and go "Aaawww, How cute!"

They are like yin and yang in that they are opposites. I mean TOTAL opposites in looks and personality. Calvin is now 22 months old. He already has a bad temper and is very impatient. He doesn't like to be around other people unless it's family. He cried non-stop as a baby and drove me nuts. Both sides of our families argue who Calvin looks like. I think he's a good mix of us both, all though I would say 60% Trent and 40 % me.

 Caden has to be one of the sweetest babies I've ever seen. He is now 5 months old. He's always smiley and happy (as long as you don't put him down). He will smile at any stranger and allow them to hold him. He is a total social butterfly. He's so patient and tolerant of his brother's roughness. As for looks, both families argued he DID NOT look like their side. But as time has passed we realized he did look like a Berrie. I would say he's 90% me and 10% Trent. I just love that my boys are so different and special in their own little ways. It just makes me melt to watch them play (usually independently).

Life is not nearly as hard as I thought having 2 little ones so close in age. It actually is not bad at all. I wanted my kids close in age so they would have a playmate, just like I did growing up. AND both my kids nap 2-3 hours at the same time. People kept making all kind of comments about how crazy I was. I heard comments like " Just how many kids DO YOU want?!?!" Like I should be ashamed of having 2 children or wanting more. BTW - I pay taxes and don't have government assistance. Or people would say "What would make you want to have them so close together?" Or " I would have at least waited 2 years." Or "Good gracious! Bless your heart, you have NO free time!" This is what I have to say about that. Just because you could not handle it doesn't mean I can't. I must be a lot stronger than you. So bless YOUR heart :)

Life is good. God is great. And people are crazy.